SO YOU KNOW I HAVE A SHOPPING ADDICTION AND LOVE FOR ALL THINGS BEAUTIFUL. I LOVE ETSY IT GIVES YOU THE OPPORTUNITY TO RETRIEVE THINGS AND BE INDIVIDUAL WITH IT AS WELL. THESE ARE MY FAVE LOOKS AND WISH LIST HOPEFULLY SOMEONE LOVES ME ENOUGH TO GET ME A FEW ITEMS.
I couldn't get Tasha's laugh out of my head or what she said as I walked out of my job that I dedicated the last few years of my life to. I was living in my home that Glen paid off because he didn't want me to have any financial worries. I swear that man was to good to be true he even asked my mother permission to court me. I mean who still did those kinds of things in this day and time? No One I know. My Mother recently learned what the Internet was a took the privilege of putting Mr.Cage name in google and she was overwhelmed in her findings. She took pride in hearing that I was dating such a handsome and well off black man. I never looked at him l like a money sign. I mean the perks were great but the time the conversations and our intimate moments were great. He was humble, Caring and most off committed to getting to know me what more could I ask for. I was suppose to be catching up with Miguel for lunch but Tasha comments kept bothering me and insecurity was slowly creepin in.
I loved Smith and Wollensky they had the best view on the entire strip of Miami Beach. I could see Miguel a mile away. I don't know who could miss him he was 6'2 the physique of a NFL football baller. The Betsey Johnson bag, lip gloss and ridiculously arched eyebrows clearly outed him a gay male. I think he took pride in standing out the way he did. We had been friends since the sandbox days when he would do my hair and play with my dolls while all the other boys were busy chasing lizards and burning ants with a magnifier glass. During Middle School he actually lived with us for a few months while children and family found him a home. I guess his father just couldn't deny the suspicions about his only sons sexuality when he discovered him kissing a boy in their back yard after school. He beat him so bad fractured 4 of his ribs broke his nose seeing it was bit much. Miguel understood and excepted his sexuality from day one at time it got him trouble when he would flirt with straight boys on the varsity team. Some would go for it and settle for a quick blow job behind the gym. Others reactions weren't so nice he was maced once which was his last time he ever attempted to convert another straight man on in the gay world a "trade". It was something about hanging out with him that always lifted my spirits.
"Hey Fish" he screamed
"oh honey I live for your bag where you get it" admiring the pink and zebra print bag
"my new boothang took me on a little shopping spree" he twirled around showing off his ensemble before sitting
"I missed you thanks for calling I needed this little girls day out" chuckling at the thought of calling him a girl
"well life is for living which is why I signed you up to help me do make up for this fashion show......excuse me waiter" attempting to let fly by his statement
"excuse me what show? you can't be serious I'm not a make up artist Miguel"
" Your face is beat for the Gods every time I see you what are you talking about it's the Miss Florida pageant so all the ladies are already beautiful throw a little eyeshadow on them bitches and they good gosh" rolling his eyes
" well what's in it for me queen"
"a friendship of ya life and a your choice of one item from the show"
" I guess that means accessories or shoes" chuckling at the fact that nothing else would fit.
"deal chick just one last thing it's tonight...."
I screamed his name so loud everyone stopped and starred to make sure I was okay Miguel just chuckled at my antics. I knew it was a reason he was going to pay for this expensive lunch date he was up to something. The night was filled with pretty ladies of the entire state some had accents that sounded as if they were from Georgia. I was assigned to five girls all when asked what type of direction they wanted to go for their look all said :"just make me pretty". I did my job and then some you would be surprised how some of those women looked in person. I even saw one of the girls throwing up her lunch in one of the waste bins which was disturbing to say the least. one of the young women who happens to be from port St Lucie,Fl name Christian stuck out to me. She was around 5'11 at least 145 lbs but she was so curvy her almond shaped eyes were piercing. During her makeup session she actually opened up about how nervous she was although she was the reigning Miss Florida and was just there to present. A lot went into being Miss Florida I never knew the gifts and prizes ranged from a free condo for a year and a cash settlement in some cases even a car. I packed my bags after finishing her up and headed on my way out. I called Glen who said he was going to a function to show his friend support. So Tonight would be a Will and Grace and Ice Cream kind of night until my eyes turned red.
Although he was missing in action last night he more then made it up for me tonight. We we're at Prime 112 Steakhouse on Wednesday nights they had live bands play everything from jazz to salsa. The food was great I am a big steak lover give me a steak and some potatoes and I'm in heaven. I loved the way he would pull me in closer gripping my hips. The Music the food and the atmosphere really was putting me in the mood. The wine helped to loosen me a bit as well. When we were together nothing mattered and no one else was even around. The convo with Tasha was slowly retracting from my thoughts tonight was the night I would give myself to him. I mean he has waited a total of six months on two continents it was about time. He never rushed me and I loved that part of him.
"Glen is that you" a woman was standing into of our table and what a familiar face it was
"Chris what's up girl" releasing me to stand up and embrace this woman
"oh you're Candice right?" keeping her eyes on him the whole time
"yes and you're Chirstian right" malice traced my voice
"hold up" stepping back looking back and forth between the two
"I did her make up for that event I told you about is this Chris?"
" yes but-"
"Glen is my ex-fiance" Christian bluntly stated
THAT'S IT FOR TONIGHT YA'LL!
DISCUSSIONS DISCUSSIONS DISCUSSIONS
YOU ALL KNOW I LOVE TRIBAL PRINT SO WHEN I HAD THESE LEGGINGS CUSTOM MADE. IT WAS WELL WORTH THE 50 DOLLARS. THE SHIRT WAS ON SALE FROM TARGET FOR 8 BUCKS AND THE VEST IS A DIY PROJECT UNDER 20 DOLLARS LEVI'S VEST FROM ROSS. THESE ARE THE ORANGE GO JANE BOOTIES I TOLD YOU GUYS ABOUT I LOVE THEM IT WAS RAINING AND THEY GOT A LITTLE WET BUT YOU GET IT LOL. OH AND YES I CUT MY HAIR ALL OFF DO YOU LIKE? THE LAST PIC IS ME AND MY ONLY CHILD DIAMOND. SHE IS SO SPOILED AND WANTED SOME CAMERA TIME SO I GAVE IT TO HER. CONFESSIONS OF A FAT GIRL COMING SOON!
SO I HAVE WITNESSED A LOT OF FAT GIRLS ROCKING CROP TOPS WITH THEIR BELLY HANGING OUT. NOW ME MYSELF AND I WILL NOT WEAR A CROP TOP WITH MY STOMACH HANGING OUT AND IT DOESN'T MEAN I'M ASHAMED OF MY WEIGHT OR MY FAT IT JUST MEANS DIFFERENT STROKES FOR DIFFERENT FOLKS. IT IS A THIN LINE BETWEEN TASTEFUL AND TACKY AND A CROP TOP WORN THE WRONG WAY CAN DEFINITELY MAKE OR BREAK YOUR FASHION STATEMENT. IF YOU WANT TO PARTICIPATE IN THE CROP TOP TREND AND ARE AFRAID BECAUSE OF YOUR BODY TYPE OR WEIGHT DON'T BE! WITH SOME ADJUSTMENTS IT CAN WORK FOR A FAT GIRL. HERE ARE SOME TIPS!
1. WEAR A CROP TOP OVER A BASIC DRESS YOU GET THE ILLUSION OF CROP AND THE DRESS HIDES THE MID SECTION
2. AMERICAN APPAREL HIGH WAISTED DISCO PANTS LET'S THE MID SECTION PEEK THROUGH A LITTLE BIT IF YOU ARE PERSISTENT ON SHOWING SKIN
3. WEAR A BASIC WIFE BEATER UNDER YOUR CROP TOP AS A LAYERING EFFECT.
When I think about my life this is the one thing that I can't seem to master along with communication skills. When placed in a situatuation I feel uncomfortable with I go into a shell but that's a whole other topic in itself. FORGIVENESS <<<<< Haunts me feels like it at times. I feel as if I am unable to forgive ppl who have done me wrong or attempted to atleast. I hold anger and in some cases hate in my heart. I am really trying but I have no idea where to start. Am I the only one facing this problem I am eager to know and if you have faced these issued how do/did you get threw them? My Mother is pastor and she reminded me of a vital scripture in the bible.
Colossians 3:13 - Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.
I need a LOT of forgiveness and God forgives willing and freely boy how I wish I was like him.
Below is a taste of a book I've been reading....
The Bible instructs us to forgive as the Lord forgave us: Colossians 3:13 - Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.
How do we forgive when we don't feel like it? How do we translate the decision to forgive into a change of heart?
We forgive by faith, out of obedience. Since forgiveness goes against our nature, we must forgive by faith, whether we feel like it or not. We must trust God to do the work in us that needs to be done so that the forgiveness will be complete.
I believe God honors our commitment to obey Him and our desire to please him when we choose to forgive. He completes the work in his time. We must continue to forgive (our job), by faith, until the work of forgiveness (the Lord's job), is done in our hearts.
Philippians 1:6- And I am certain that God, who began the good work within you, will continue his work until it is finally finished on the day when Christ Jesus returns.
How will we know if we have truly forgiven?
Corrie Ten Boom, a Christian woman who survived a Nazi concentration camp during the Holocaust, said, "Forgiveness is to set a prisoner free, and to realize the prisoner was you."
We will know the work of forgiveness is complete when we experience the freedom that comes as a result. We are the ones who suffer most when we choose not to forgive. When we do forgive, the Lord sets our hearts free from the anger, bitterness, resentment and hurt that previously imprisoned us.
Most times, however, forgiveness is a slow process.
Matthew 18:21-22 -Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, "Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother when he sins against me? Up to seven times?" Jesus answered, "I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times.
This answer by Jesus makes it clear that forgiveness is not easy for us. It's not a one-time choice and then we automatically live in a state of forgiveness. Forgiveness may require a lifetime of forgiving, but it is important to the Lord. We must continue forgiving until the matter is settled in our heart.
What if the person we need to forgive is not a believer?
I have found that prayer is one of the best ways to break down the wall of un-forgiveness in my heart. When I begin to pray for the person who has wronged me, God begins to give me new eyes to see that person and a new heart to care for that person. As I pray I begin to see that person as God sees them, and I realize that person is precious to the Lord. I also see myself in a new light, just as guilty of sin and failure as the other person. I too am in need of forgiveness. If God did not withhold his forgiveness from me, why should I withhold my forgiveness from another?
Is it okay to feel anger and want justice for the person we need to forgive?
This question presents another reason to pray for the person we need to forgive. We can pray for God to deal with the injustices, for God to judge the person's life, and then we can leave that prayer at the altar. We no longer have to carry the anger. Although it is normal for us to feel anger toward sin and injustice, it is not our job to judge the other person in their sin.
Luke 6:37 -Do not judge, and you will not be judged. Do not condemn, and you will not be condemned. Forgive, and you will be forgiven.
Why must we forgive?
The best reason to forgive is because Jesus commanded us to forgive. We learn from Scripture, if we don't forgive, neither will we be forgiven:
Matthew 6:14-16 -For if you forgive men when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive men their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins.
We also forgive so that our prayers will not be hindered: Mark 11:25 -And when you stand praying, if you hold anything against anyone, forgive him, so that your Father in heaven may forgive you your sins.
In summary , we forgive out of obedience to the Lord. It is a choice, a decision we make. However, as we do this "forgiving," we discover the command is in place for our own good, and we receive the reward of our forgiveness - freedom
I came across this movie on my on demand channel and when I say I was on the edge of my seat. I know sometimes we get so caught up with the norm of what we go for i.e. comedy, chick flicks, drama that we stay in those areas. I watch EVERYTHING from documentaries to suspense I mostly stay away from scary movies (don't judge me) but this movie was great. Steven Spielberg is the Producer so expect for the visuals to be great. Ladies please please please feel free to watch this movie and comment or even give suggestions for me to watch below is the wiki description of the movie. I only have two hand so this movie gets two thumbs wayyyyyyy up.
On her way home from school on a snowy December day in 1973, 14-year-old Susie Salmon is lured into a makeshift underground den in a cornfield and brutally raped and murdered, the latest victim of a serial killer--the man she knew as her neighbor, Mr. Harvey. From heaven, Susie keeps watch over her grieving family and friends, as well as her brazen killer and the sad detective working on her case.
So Tony Finally made her way to visit us small people at work today to pick up her things. I saw the postings of her resignation and just couldn't believe it. Almost a month has passed since she made her way to Paris, France. she sounded so happy when she called me telling me about her trip and screaming in between at how wonderful he was. Who the fuck do she think she is bouncing around on continents like she has no worries. I don't know maybe Mr. Cage is experimenting to see what it's like to be with a big girl. It could be on his bucket list it's something I know it is how can a man with that much money look as great as he does want her? I'll be happy for her though but when he leaves her high and dry with no job she better not come to me for comfort. I am single have been for a few months finally decided to give myself a break. Getting a Man is no hard task all they want is a banging body and ass like beyonce which I'm well equipped with both.
This body of mines has always gotten mens attention even the unwanted kind. I can remember being in the 6th grade while other girls were just learning what boys were. I was a 44DD with baby baring hips a flat tummy which easily gotten me mistaken for more then just 13. I took notice to how easily men gave up their wordly possessions with just a peek of nipple. My own father couldn't keep his hands off me I would catch him looking at me as I played hop scotch and not with a fatherly love glance. The man that birthed me bought me into this world and promised to protect me. I found myself at the age 11 on my way to Soccer pratice in the back of our Mini Van. He exposed himself to me with the most sincere smile and proceeded to take my virginity. With every thrust I cried out for help seems like it turned him on cause he went harder and deeper. I could feel myself ripping from the inside and the blood all over my uniform confirmed what I already knew. I was no longer a girl/ child I was made a woman by the man who birth me. My Mother was too busy praising him for his good job and how well he provided for us that when I built up the nerve to tell her. She put me on the street accussed me of not being a virgin. She said she saw how my hips had spread I was fucking and tried to blame my father for it. He just smiled even told my mother to forgive me for my lies and that I could still live there. I was done with the nightly visits or the late trips from soccer practice with pit stops in the parking lot of walmart for me to pleasure him. Putting me out was the best thing she could have ever done. I now know that men aren't worth my time but to give me money and shut the fuck up.
"Hey Girl" Tony chimed knocking me out of my memories
"what is up with you ms.jackpot" looking at her up and down the girl looked like she stepped off a runway
"oh hush Tasha it's nothing like that I am currently looking for another job as we speak just not here"
" you just like the jefferson's huh moving on up" humming the bridge to the 80's show
"it's not like that so stop we're getting to know each other that's all" she looked flushed
"you gave him some I bet a woman doesn't go to paris for free you look like the freaky too good and quiet"
tasha pushed the envelope just to see would she budge
" welp I think it's about time for me to go check ya later girl" checking her watch she hurried to the elevator
"don't forget us little people" tasha smirked
Tony stopped in her tracks she wasn't sure what Tasha was getting at exactly being single for as long as she had been was no easy task. Although she wasn't actually in a relationship with Glen she was definetly happy in the direction it was going in so why could her homegirl just be happy for her. There was never a moment that she didn't hold out hope that Tasha would find a good guy. She had found a lot of good guys that she always found something wrong with from he's broke to he doesn't like the same music as her to he's toooo perfect. She found an excuse not to be loved or love another man ever now her jealously was written all over her face.
"excuse me what does that mean tasha?"
"you know excatly what it means Tony don't play" folding her arms
"acutally I don't if I did I wouldn't ask for you to explain it"
"well don't get so comfortable being the apple of his eye trust you're just a test project hun you are no threat to the thousand of girls waiting at his door to suck him up" she chuckled holding her stomach
" well time will tell hun" waling towards the elevator head held high
The last part of the conversation played over and over in my head was Tasha right am I just a project. I was going against anything I had ever done and the person that should have been the happiest from me wasn't. I could count the times on one hand that I gushed about a man......once! seems to me like as long as I was single and sad and stayed in that lane it was okay. Although Tasha would never admit I'm sure she had a thing for Glen for sometime now. I wasn't having sex with Glen and it had been over a month of us spending almost everyday with each other. He respected my decision and never pushed the issue I wonder why he must be getting it from somewhere else.
It's so crazy how this topic came about but it did and I'm glad in away it did. I visited a few boutiques and one imparticular had marks all over them. This is not the fault of the owner it's acutally blamed on the consumer. Recently Miami has had a bunch of boutiques come about like it's seriously one on every corner. A boutique doesn't have the oppurtunity to have a million pieces like forever 21, go jane, bakers etc. so their itmes are limited which means customers like you and me should be a little bit more considerate. I actually prep myself before going shopping especially these are my procedures.
usually you ladies see my outfit of the night since I am a night owl but my mother woke me up to take her for a girls day out so I was forced to see the sun. Miami is getting cold no more skirts or dresses for me I think I'm going to invest in some colorful tights any suggestions? I have had these sequenced leggings for about a year now and wore them a total of two times. I purchased this shirt from seven jeans via macy's for 20 dollars with an extra 50 percent off. In the picture you can't really tell but the words sparkled to which is the reason I wore these pants. My hair is different I didid away with the blonde. Most of my hairstyles are closed in all around beand sewin in to protect my edgeline.
I only have one more of those bags left on my online store and I just added a few items. CLICK HERE
okay soooooooooooooooo as the world know American Apparel finally after saying a million times that they wouldn't manufacture plus size extended their sizes to XL. I have been very familiar with American Apparel clothing i was kind of skeptical about the sizing and if they would even fit a plus size woman but i purchased one pair just in case they didn't fit. I love love love love these tights I am normally a 18/20 sometime as 22 but these tights were great! I had a 20 dollar off gift certificate but retail regularly is 34 dollars but they were well worth it. I turned one of my sparkle dresses into a shirt and it came out great. I hated this nude pump with this outfit and changed into a silver pump upon my arrival. Tomorrow is my chill out no club attire for me at all.
well ladies as you know from my previous post about Thick Thursday I informed you of Thick Thursday/BBW strip club. My first visit I wasn't equipped with my camera. Thick Thursday's is actually on once a month (every third Thursday). The last visit the ladies were equipped with a stage this time around the club was equipped with portable stripper poles and was being utilized by both the professional strippers and random women who wanted to dance. The man to woman ratio was pretty great and in Miami that is usually slim to none. It was the owner Jabari's birthday and he had some special guest (local rappers: dunk ryders). All in all Thick Thursday's is definitely an event FUN,FUN, FUN. I contacted the owner who was well familiar with my blog and approved my bringing in the camera. These all were taken from camera. Now that you have seen it for yourselves what do you think would stripping be something that you would consider?
I got off work at 11pm and had to make it to a friends party in less then a hour let's just say I had to do whatever it took to be there on time. I didn't have time to find a outfit so everything you is recycled except for my shoes. shirt f21 pants michael kors and booties gojane.com
I support the small business I really do but there is a thin line between support and delusion. I live in Miami and recently there has been a uprising of "boutiques" in my area. I have visited a few and honestly I'm disappointed. When I think of a boutique I think of exclusive items that no one else will have the NEW NEW you know? today I was browsing threw fb and can across this foolishness. The Miami Based vendor is selling go jane heels that are $38.00 buck for $69 dollars! I couldn't help myself from this rant this is exactly what I was talking about on my youtube channel ladies educate yourselves or you won't be getting bang for your buck.
It kind of upsets me I guess if people don't know better 69 dollars sounds great I guess. I just urge everyone for reasons like this to do your research. when I purchased my leopard dress and discovered it was dead sold out I didn't care if I had to pay twice as much as suggested retail value because of it's availability but a shoe that there in every color and size I just couldn't do it? have you ever felt like this?
we are in paris,france can you believe it? because I can't this man has to be out of a magazine. we talked about everything on that flight. I must admit his way of living is way beyond my spectrum of every thinking personal planes the ability to get up and fly half way around the world with no worries. He was very forward about his feelings about love, marriage and everything in between. A man like that can have any woman he desires which he explained is very annoying. I didn't know women were handing themselves over on silver platters sneaking in pent house suites. No amount of a men's wealth would every make me settle or sell myself sort for a hermes bag. Our way threw customs went smoothly seeing as to how we had no bags. I knew not one word in french except for we or is wi wi don't make me lie. To my surprise he spoke fluent french which made me feel even safer in this unknown country. Paris was beautiful to say the least the weather The People and don't even get me started on the fashion boy was the fashion great even the airport women dressed as if it was fashion week.
Finally making our way to the exit a white Phantom Royals Royce was spotted in the distance. He even took the privilege of including my name on the sign the driver held up. Today was turning into a fairytale out of a book. A few times I questioned myself as to what I was doing here with this amazing. Its seems like he could hear my doubts bouncing off the walls. The ride to the hotel was siren the country was beautiful. We arrived to the Ritz Carlton it felt like a matter of minutes I guess the saying is true time flies when you having fun. The view from the 28th floor could not be explained we had 360 degree the entire floor was ours. I had to get out of these clothes lord knows even Spanx after a few hours can cause irritation. sneaking up from behind he placed his arms around my waist nestling his chin on my shoulder blade he whispered
"who do you want to wear tongiht?" placing small kisses along my lower earlobe
"Excuse me?" it confused me
"Gucci, Hermes, Miu Miu, you name it's yours what size are you?" stepping back attempting to guess
"I don't think----"
"12?" he questioned
"I should get out of these clothes for now" rushing to bathroom and slamming the door
what kind of question was that who do I want to wear I was an ample size 18 and Versace would be rolling over in his grave making clothing in that size. He was clueless to say the least about dating a woman. I was fine with dressing up and looking fab but when it came down to revealing sizes of panties and clothes it made me cringe. I had a man in the other room that just had hour long conversations about what he want from me and I was running like a chicken with my head cut off. I believe at moments I'm my own worst critic. The bathroom was huge and I found solitude I took a shower he had a massage therapist waiting for as soon as i came out the shower. I called for him while getting my massage but he never answered. after my massage I walked amongst our suite in my robe since it was the only thing that fit at the moment.
"Mrs.Reid" a woman called out from the living room
entering the living room there was a woman of my complexion and hip squeezed into the perfect leather leggins and fushia blazer. she was equipped with measuring tape pencil and pad. I thought she was a student or some new form of french maid. She greeted me with a double kiss with the cutest french american accent. She began to talk about fashion and what it means to the plus size woman in Paris and the UK. My eyes searched the room for him I even called his name a few times but got no answer. I really didn't mean to be rude but I really didn't understand where this was going with this young woman.
"Excuse me what's your name" stopping her in her tracks
"Evevlyn from ASOS Curve Mr.Cage sent for me with the understanding to provide you every article in our 2011 spring and Fall collection" she smiled like a proud spokeswoman
"ASOS is in the UK what do you mean sent for you?" I was confused
"oh ma'am I do apologise Mr.Cage sent a private jet to retrieve me" she smiled as four butlers bought in racks and racks of clothes bags from hermes shoes from louboutin. In a room filled with the finest threads the world could offer a butler bought in a note:
I stepped out for a few A woman loves to play dress up I assume. I apologise if i upset you earlier I was just trying to help. No bag is too much Heel too expensive everything is for you talking to you is so easy. My hands feel like the belong in yours and My heart skips a beat when you smile. You are a employee of my company and I am your boss for the last day. I hate to inform you Mrs. Reid but as of today you are fired from my company effective immediately. My job is to make you happy I will work overtime without pay to ensure everyday of your life you smile. See you in a bit enjoy your girl time!
oh and I went blonde.....do tell me what you think! I was told I always do the same thing same style and I woke up and said what the hell. lol this life I live is crazy sometimes. I believe in living on a whim I go with the wind you only live once make sure you live it up! I attended a party with friends. I found this leopard/cheetah dress at marshalls you guys know how I feel about prints.
I went thrifting my shirt is thrifted for 50 cent and those pants will be in an entire other post cause their just that great! the shoes are from karmaloop I had so much fun that day!
Did he just say date? Now I don't want to jump the broom maybe he had a business proposal for me. I mean I have been putting in extra work hoping that it wouldn't go unseen. What should I wear a dress maybe a pants suit yep for sure. This man was standing her in front of me smelling great and looking better and asking me for a date. Lips slightly parting my lips and a little below a whisper I polietly accepted his request for dinner. In two days I will be seeing Mr.Cage outside of work and the thoughts or the what if ran threw my mind. As smoothly as he came he was gone just as silent while my world had suddendly been torn upside. where would he pick me up? I had given him no address or telephone number that matter. I immediately found myself leaping from my seat and enroute to his office. I found him standing at the door way to his massive office I didn't want to seem to desperate.
"you don't have my info"
"2452 summer terrace" he smiled
"....but how" confused was an understatment
" Mrs. Reid I own the company it's my job and If I'm truly interested in a Woman I do my homework"
That statement confirmed that this was no business date we would no be talking about anything work related. The dress was a definite and now I found myself back at my desk searching Torrid, Asos, Ashely Stewart and any other plus size site I could think of at the time. I was willing to pay $28.00 for overnight. A plus size woman doesn't have the luxury of waiting until the last minute to find a outfit. I need weeks sometimes months to find a perfect dress or lingere. This would be well worth it and besides I haven't been on a date in God Knows how long. Nicole and Tasha were sitting on my desk upon my return just waiting to hear the details. I have never been one to tell my business especially to other women because lord knows how that may go. This was the first time I actually had something worth talking about and to be honest it felt great!
" soooooooooooooooooooooooooo" tasha grinned her mouth was watering
"what" I knew exactly what she was trying to get to
"you know what she's talking about" Tasha butted her way in
" Well I'm to busy looking for something to wear I don't have time for the gossip" beaming with happiness
"Omgggggggggggggggggggg" they both jumped in unison Tasha put her caller on hold and Nicole had actually unplugged her earphones.
For two hours they helped me look for outfits Tasha even agreed to give me some fly natural look she saw in hype hair. Nicole was looking up natural make up tutorials on youtube and it was a group effort and somehow it felt great. Work was over and I headed over to Shaq 24 hour fitness for a quick hip hop spin class. I looked forward to those days I was able to unwind and just really be myself. The gym used to be depressing I swear. There I was thinking it was about exercise and health until I witnessed half naked women walking around attempting to attract the men and boy did it work. Only in Miami where women went to the gym with there hair done and a face full of make up. I have grown to accept my body and the things I can't change. Two days had come and gone so fast it felt like it was just yesterday. I was ready and I might say I was feeling very sexy. I choose a black lace bra with matching boy short from Lane Bryant It was something about boy shorts that made my butt feel and look so big. Everyone knows a nice ass can take you places in the right dress. I received a boquet of yellow roses today with the note that read these flowers are beautiful but they got nothing on you. I don't know what I did to deserve this attention but I thank God I did it.
Work was over and I was preparing myself for tonight Ledisi was blasting threw my speakers my glass was filled with wine. I actually prepared a small salad to eat before my dinner it was something that I always seemed to do on first date. I think every woman appears shy when first meeting someone for me eating was a major issue. It was a trick that my grandmother used to always make my mother do when I was growing up. I can remember following my mother around the house reminding her to eat something before her date arrived. I took that little trick along with me I guess out of habit. My grandmother was about 4'11 a buck ten with shoulder length blue black hair. She loved that color it was like it was her little secret at first glance it was black with a touch of light or sun the blue would appear. She prided herself on her figure up until her death she would get up in the morning do her make up and even as a house wife dress up as if she had somewhere to go.
Me and My mother never spoke about weight or health for that matter but I think my grandmother made it clear how she felt. She would pick at other women my mothers size call them all kinds of names under her breath and although she never said it My Mom knew she was ashamed. I could remember after my mom divorced and my grandmother had come to stay with us after my grandfather passed. My mother exited her room in a form fitting floor length sequinced dressed I thought she looked like an angel. She pranced around the living room giving me and sisters a view of her outfit. It was her first date in 7 yrs.
"mama you are beautiful" my sister squilled
No sooner my grandmother came out of room to find my mother standing there in all her glory of 265lbs and confident. "where the hell do you think you going in that dress?"
" on a date ma" their eyes met
"I hope to hell not you can see all of your rolls in the back a man don't want to see your damn rolls" she chuckled loudly
"well guess what ma this man does and when he met me they were showing so guess what he better get him some butter and enjoy"
My Mom had the confidence of any woman 10 sizes smaller then her and I think that's what men loved so much about her. She knew she was fat and didn't give a damn who thought so or tried to hide it. She was fat and in your face and fab take it or leave that shit at the door is what she would say. My grandmother never understood how she could be so proud of her mishaped hips and pertruding belly. She put my mother on diets growing up only to find receipts of fast food restaurants. she was the captain of her schools varsity cheerleading squad and almost every jock on the football team secretly enjoyed her ample breast during half time but wouldn't admit it. So why was she still FAT and happy? My grandmother would never understand on her dying bed she encouraged my mother to loose weight if she ever wanted to find a husband to love her. ten years later my mother was still fat and happily married to of all things a doctor who specialiaze in gastro procedures like lap band , gastric bypass and the sleeve procedure. Although Fat had given him success a nice home and money in the bank he loved fuller women and my mother was the entire package isn't that ironic a doctor who makes ppl smaller wants and loves his woman bigger.
we have 8 o'clock reservations it was 7:30 and I had just buzzed him the gate I could feel the butterflies coming now. should I hug him? maybe a handshake is more appropriate definetly hand shake. This back and forth thing went on and on until I could hear the knock at my door. I slowly walked the door allowing him to knock on the door again. Never answer on the first knock is another one of my grandmother philospies about men that I actually applied. To my suprise it wasn't him instead he had sent his driver for me. I was somewhat disappointed it felt so informal but I smiled and went with the flow of things.
" Mrs.Reid I presume" taking his hat off
" Yes how may I help you" half intrigued at this point
" Mr.Cage has sent me retrieve you do yo have any plants or pets" attempting to look over my shoulder
"No what kind of question is that"
"you will need identification where you are going do you have any?"
searching threw my purse I found both my I.D. and passport " This is all I have"
"All is well then follow me"
"what requires Id"
He never answered my question he opened the door to a black range rover sport and presumed to drive. we were on the 836 and I could clearly see Miami International Airport in the distance. The area was host to great restaurants I'm sure he picked out a great one. I noticed We were entering into the airport was he just arriving from a business trip? Maybe we should have rescheduled. I could see him standing at the entrance of Air France. He had no bags just a great smile and a handfull of flowers tulips this time. I exited the car and embraced him fully wrapping his hands around my waist I slightly kissed his cheek. it's like it just came naturally and he didn't stop me which was a clear sign of it being okay to do so.
"why are we here" looking around the airport
he quickly checked his watch and stated "we're going to late let's go" he grabbed my hand and proceeded inside of airport. I was so confused was there a restaurant in here I was dressed up heels and all running threw a airport with the owner of my company like it was normal. after several turns and stops and questions to tsa staff. we were at gate d16 I watched him as he reached into his pockets and presented them to lady at the gate. we were on first class flight to paris france with no baggae but the clothes on our backs and didn't know what I was doing. I have never done anything like this for a flight to paris I saw no other passengers while entering the plane it became clear that we were the passengers the entire plane was empty and acutally customized with the intials GC for glen cage. I turned to him to look into his face for anwers. I had so many questions that I needed answered and all he could say is " I did my homework Mrs.Reid"
-------------------------------------------------THATS IT UNTIL NEXT WEEK----------------------------------
DISCUSSION: HOW HARD IS IT FOR YOU TO FIND ITMES?
HAVE YOU EVER HAD A GYM ISSUE?